A Reply to Adele

Apparently Adele Smith reads our blog. Here is her recent comment from her Facebook wall:

There's a cute two-post blog dedicated to discrediting me as an advocate AND as a rape survivor. Because this is what some of my fellow Catholics feel called to do, apparently.
You should be ashamed of yourselves, but shame is something you're incapable of feeling.
Unfortunately for you, I have the examples of numerous saints who were maligned and abused and discredited and attacked for doing the right thing. People who weren't allowed to preach or say mass or leave their homes or were reviled in the streets, now to be acknowledged in Heaven and adorned with halos. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of me...
Tear my clothes. Cast your stones. Spit your hatred. I will not stop fighting for survivors. I will gladly be a target to help keep them safe and help future survivors.
You are Pharisees.
Screencap and send this along to them. This post is for friends only. Maybe just drop a [kiss] before you do, so I know who is betraying me. Cool.

We’ll just make a couple of points:

First, we didn’t discredit you as a rape survivor (we presume that by this you mean that we attempted to show that you were not raped). We specifically said at the outset that, “the purpose of this piece is not to question whether or not Adele was raped. The purpose is only to show that her story, as portrayed in public forums, used lies and half-truths to manufacture outrage at the college.” That is exactly what the piece attempted to do.

Second, you answered exactly none of the points we raised.

Third, you write, “Unfortunately for you, I have the examples of numerous saints who were maligned and abused and discredited and attacked for doing the right thing.” This begs the question: Is spreading a demonstrably false narrative “doing the right thing”? (If you dispute that the narrative is false, please respond to the actual points we raised in the piece.)

Further you write, “Blessed are those who are persecuted because of me...” Don’t make yourself a martyr, you aren’t being persecuted because of Christ. And you aren't being persecuted for defending victims of sexual assault (just because someone disagrees with you doesn't mean she thinks rape is okay). We are challenging you on the facts. If we got something wrong, correct us. 

Fourth--this is sincere and from the heart--Adele, when the Simcha Fisher piece first broke, and you saw the blow-back in the Christendom community, you had doubts. You wondered whether you had spoken badly.[1] You wondered whether going to Fisher was a mistake.

In fact, you even admitted that you were frustrated that Simcha had blamed the college's policies for your rape, and you said outright that you disagreed with her about this. You wrote,

I think too many [alumni] are focusing on Simcha's implications that the college is to blame for WHY I was raped which I disagree with. I don't blame them for what happened with me and [the accused]. [2] 

The alumni focused on that claim because it was the main point of the article--the implication was right in the title. Furthermore, it was a patently ludicrous claim, as you realized. Why, Adele, would you be angry at fellow alumni who have labeled Simcha's piece a hit piece, when you yourself agree with its critics that its first and principal point wrongly assigned blame to the college?

Those doubts and misgivings you felt were well placed. But those you trusted and chose to confide in radicalized you; they crushed those healthy doubts. They pulled you away from healing and pulled you toward hate. (If you disagreed with Simcha's main thesis, why didn't you correct the record?) They made you feel like a savior--the only person who would say that rape was wrong. 

How many real-life friends have you unfriended since January? How many people that you once liked and trusted--people who were never anything but good to you--have you chosen to purge from you life? How many people have you called names or mocked or maligned (in public or private)? And based on what? Are you sure that the friends you have chosen are your real friends?

We are writing this not because we hate or dislike you. We are writing this because your words are causing harm and need to be answered lest they cause even more harm. We have nothing to be ashamed of. We are speaking truth because it is necessary to prevent further unjust harm.

Once again, if you believe what we have said is untrue please--we ask this sincerely--let us know. We will be the first to retract an error.


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